UN-GENTLEMANLY!!

grrr. this happened yesterday. you see. today, i'm gonna have some relatives over. so i had to go get some stuff with my mom at NTUC yesterday. so we went to Hougang Mall. yep. and after we bought the stupid stuff. we realised that it was so freaking heavy la. ok. nvm. so we. no, I struggled to carry those stuff. and on the way out, i saw, Guan Tou, Wei Tian, Desmond, Wei Qing, and i dunno who else. and they jsut said, "eh! hi!" and then walk away. O.O|'|.... seriously. my mom was like. "so un-gentlemanly! call themselves a boy! not helping a damsel in distress." seriously. the least they could do was carry the thing out until some where further right? and that stupid Guan Tou still have the cheek to say that i look like a freaking princess carrying all that junk. THANKS. SERIOUSLY. i want to stick his head down the toilet bowl and flush him clean. sheesh. arrgh.

anyway. i'm just so upset with everything right now. there's my first match tmr against mok Jing Qiong. whee. i'm just gonna get trashed and all. but nvm.. i've got the support that i need. LOVE YOU. <333!

-i've waited so long.

and i still am waiting.

<3;withallmylove!

very un-well planned beach outing

whee!! my name!! nice right? ok. my back and knees were aching after trying to make this thing thingy. (((: love it! and plus.. i didn't erase it from the ground. and i doubt the tide reaches that part. oh wells. (((:

oh well. this one. i was feeling zi lian.a nd i guess. yep! poor jy wasn't in the pic. how sad!! and i think i look like s certain someone. if you don't look close enough. yep! <333!

\

whee!!! me and jy's hands!!! ok. yea. not bad right? i was trying to not laugh. but jy's last finger was abit retarded. but this pic can't see la. (((: hahaha. ((((:

---

and you know sometimes some feelings don't change.

and right now, all i know is that my feelings for you haven't.

and its as certain as how the sun will rise tomorrow.

<333!

i love you!!!

<3;withallmylove!

Call the Man

Call The Man

Close the door
Shut the world away
All the fight's gone from this wounded heart
Across the floor
Dreams and shadows play
Like wind blown refugees

Call the man
Who deals in love beyond repair
He can heal the world
Of hearts in need of care
Shine a light ahead
When the next step is unclear
Call the man
He's needed here

I close my eyes
I remember when
Your sweet love filled this empty room
The tears I cry
Won't bring it back again
Unless the lonely star should fall

Call the man
Who deals in love beyond repair
He can heal the world
Of hearts in need of care
Shine a light ahead
When the next step is unclear
Call the man
He's needed here

Needed in the chaos and confusion
From the plains to city hall
Needed where the proud who walk the wire are set to fall

Call the man
Who deals in once upon a time
Maybe he
Can mend this broken heart of mine
Shine a light ahead
Now the future isn't clear
Call the man
He's needed here
Call the man
He's needed here

He's needed here
He's needed here
Call the man

He's needed here
Right here right now
---

i'm missing you, missing us.

where have all of us gone to?

come back, but would you?

-empty promises,

broken hearts,

and tears of lonely sorrows.

'how can i feel so right loving you, and feel so wrong at the same time?'

---

if i called out to you,

would you come to me?

if i needed your holding me,

would you come hold me?

if i wanted all of you,

would you give me just that?

all of you..

that small love that you can give me,

would you give it to me?

---

<3;withallmylove!

LADY MARMALADE

LOVE THIS SONG!!! btw. Jarrod was trying his best to get the sentence "Voulez vous coucher avec moi" right. he says he'll need it in the future. btw, it means, "will you sleep with me tonight." YUCK.

i've got the song under my Interest! play it!<3

-fantasies of me,

why don't you just admit it!

<3;withallmylove!

I could ask for no more but Time.

i was given a power so small, to love. and i gave my all to you. i wanted those special moments in those special days where you may hug me on the beach and hopefully say, "i love you so much." that's all that i asked for. but that's all that i never get. i've held you in my arms before, told you before that i didn't want you to go. and i meant every single word of it. but things change, people change. no doubt, our hormones are still changing as i'm writing this. but no doubt that my feelings for you have changed, its more intensed now. i feel more insecure now, and all i want is for you to come back to my arms, hold me, and whisper to my ear, how much you missed me, and wished you have never left me. that picture will stay in my mind, now and always as a wait for you to return. never again will i let you go when you tell me that, but i don't want you to hurt me anymore, not like i hurt others.

some things just don't turn out right, does it? i wished with so little of what i've got that things would turn out ok. i had this gut feeling since forever that this would happen. we would drift apart as i and *** had. and i didn't want it to happen. how could this ever happen? we had nothing to stand between us this time. but this is just plain stupid. i have to love someone who doesn't give a damn. someone who doesn't know what's happening in my life. and i have to give someone who cares up, in exchange. talk about selfish love. i never thought i would be the one to falter. i never thought i would be the one to change. i never thought i would be the one to cause so much pain. it's all my fault. and i don't wish for nothing more but for things to go on smoothly. i know it would be impossible to hold on and wish for more, because i know part of me wants nothing out of it. so i just wish we'd move on, still friends, no, closer than that, if possible. i don't want to stop caring for you. i've grown so used to caring for you, loving you in the deepest part of my heart, and letting you go could mean just pure pain to my heart. but i know now for sure that i shouldn't love you like so. i shouldn't hold on to this, this way. i know for sure that i want  to move on in my life, not like that. i've had enough of this thing called love. and it hurts to love someone. that's to teenage love and knowing why it hurts like hell. because right now, im hesistating. right now, i couldn't give a damn if i cry my heart out for anyone. because i've come to know that, that only hurts myself, and it doesn't make the matter better. i suck it up, hold my tears, and stand with pride against all odds. i know i'll work out, we'll work out, and sooner than anyone could blink their eye, we'll be alright once more. nothing more and nothing less to expect from either of us. but at least we knew we once had love. i'm sorry. im selfish. but i know that i can't carry on lying to myself anymore. i know you've been a replacement for my lost love, ***. who wasn't? everyone whom i've gotten close to, who i've trusted with my stories, were just a poor attempt of covering up who i am, hurting and scared. i don't want any of us to go. i want us to be together, as a family.

i'm sorry. and i love you, as how i love everyone who's been there for me when im absolutely down. i know im just cowardly, and i've been avoiding you with every opportunity given, but i want you to know that its because i love you enough to not want to hurt you. bear that in mind, my dear. i'm sorry, i need time.

it means everything to me to know that you're there, and it means absolutely nothing to know that you don't care. because i love you.

-to be caught loving you,

but not admitting i do.

<3;withallmylove.